Good Morning! The cold war between banks and private credit just turned hot. After Jamie Dimon warned of “cockroaches” in the system, Blue Owl’s Marc Lipschultz fired back, saying banks might want to check their own books first.

Bank of America and Morgan Stanley continued Wall Street’s strong quarter, and KKR is investing in a startup offering fractional ownership of private jets.

Blackstone is building out a new unit focused on introducing private equity and credit products into 401(k)s, and MANGO is becoming the new FAANG.

Plus: OpenAI is in hot water for rolling out erotica for verified accounts, Eric Adams says he has an amazing job offer, and why you need to be bored.

With $170M in reservations already in, NatGold is drawing early interest as a gold-backed alternative to fiat. Learn more.

SQUEEZ OF THE DAY

Shorts Getting Smoked

The only people down bad in this market are the short sellers. The 250 most shorted U.S. stocks are up 57% this year, the best run since the 2020-21 meme-stock rally. 

Traders betting against the most popular shorted stocks are getting crushed. Some of the most shorted names are ripping: Terawulf is up 183%, Hertz is up 49%, with both having more than 40% of their shares on loan.

A key reason is that retail money keeps pouring into the market, and every dip gets bought faster. “The demand for traditional short selling just isn’t there,” said Carson Block of Muddy Waters. “Like all corrections these days, the manifestation of risk is really just an opportunity to BTFD [buy the f*cking dip].”

Even short-selling legends have thrown in the towel. Jim Chanos and Hindenburg’s Nate Anderson have scaled back as retail money flows into the space. “Ever since 2020, we’ve been waiting for rationality,” said Anne Stevenson-Yang of J Capital. “It just keeps going up. Retail rides the wave whether it’s justified or not.”

And some are concerned that even nefarious businesses are rallying. AppLovin, a $200 billion ad-tech company accused of inflating its AI chops,  is up 76% this year. The company denies everything. The market doesn’t care.

One short-fund manager put it bluntly: “Junk stocks have outperformed so dramatically it’s impossible to make money shorting them. There’s been a death of consequences.” An example, Trevor Milton, the disgraced Nikola founder, just announced his “comeback” in private aviation.

Takeaway: The AI-crypto-nuclear-quantum rally has vaporized gravity and fair valuations. With every dip getting bought and even fraudsters getting sequels, the bears are out of places to hide. As a wise man once said… stonks only go up 🚀.

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So far, NatGold has drawn $170 million in reservations ahead of its official launch, with more than 75,000 tokens already reserved. The first 25,000 tokens will be issued at a 10% discount to Baseline Intrinsic Value.

HEADLINES

Top Reads

• Jamie Dimon’s “cockroach” jab reignites Wall Street feud with private credit firms (BB)

• Wall Street boom lifts profits at Bank of America and Morgan Stanley (YF)

• KKR bets on startup offering fractional ownership of private jets (WSJ)

• Blackstone joins race to bring private assets to the 401(k) market (WSJ)

• MANGO is the new FAANG (Axios) 

• ChatGPT will soon allow erotica for verified accounts (Axios)

• Chinese firms pull back from U.S. listings as Hong Kong IPOs surge (CNBC)

• Apollo sees more buyout opportunities in Europe than the U.S. (BB)

• Nscale eyes IPO following $14 billion deal with Microsoft (CNBC)

• Jamie Dimon says it’s “semi-rational” to hold gold in portfolios (BB)

• New Yorkers stand in line for hours just to eat dinner (NYP)

• NYC Mayor Eric Adams tells staff he’s been offered an “amazing” job (BB)

• Wall Street rides IPO momentum as equity advisory revenues surge (BB)

• HSBC upgrades Nvidia, says AI tailwinds could drive shares up nearly 80% (BB)

• LVMH sales rebound, offering a rare bright spot for the luxury sector (WSJ)

CAPITAL PULSE

Markets Rundown

Market Update

• Stocks rallied as upbeat earnings supported sentiment.

• Large-cap indexes rebounded modestly from yesterday’s dip, with investors balancing trade-policy risks, an extended government shutdown, and signs of economic resilience.

• European stocks moved higher overnight, helped by positive earnings and signs that the French government will survive a no-confidence vote.

• Small-caps outperformed, with the Russell 2000 supported by expectations for faster Fed easing.

Economic Data Highlights

• Fed Chair Powell signaled the Fed is preparing to cut rates at its October 29 meeting.

• Powell acknowledged inflation remains above target but emphasized downside risks to the labor market.

• The Fed may also pause the runoff of its bond holdings, supporting liquidity conditions.

• Bond markets rallied, pushing the 2-year yield near a three-year low and the 10-year yield toward 4%.

• The combination of lower rates and stable Fed holdings continues to anchor market optimism.

Reported Earnings

• Bank of America (BAC) and Morgan Stanley (MS) – Both topped expectations, supported by strong trading and investment-banking results.

Earnings Today

• Taiwan Semiconductor (TSM) – Watch for updates on AI chip demand and production capacity.

• Charles Schwab (SCHW) – Focus on client inflows and interest-rate sensitivity.

• U.S. Bancorp (USB) – Key to monitor loan growth and credit quality trends.

Movers & Shakers

• (+) Papa John’s ($PZZA) +9% after the pizza chain received takeover interest from Apollo.

• (+) Morgan Stanley ($MS) +5% because the investment bank announced its biggest earnings beat in five years.

• (–) PNC Financial ($PNC) -4% after the firm announced weaker guidance than expected.

Prediction Markets

• Kalshi traders are projecting Bitcoin to hit $131K by Dec ‘25

• Trade on real-world events with Kalshi. Use code OWS to get a $10 bonus when you trade $10.

Private Dealmaking

• Global Infrastructure Partners, AIP, and MGX agreed to buy Aligned Data Centers for $40 billion

• Lone Star Funds bought Hillenbrand for $3.8 billion

• Novo Nordisk agreed to buy Omeros for up to $2.1 billion

• S&P Global will buy With Intelligence for $1.8 billion

• Tubulis, a developer of antibody-drug conjugates for solid tumors, raised $334 million

• TrueCar agreed to go private for $227 million

For more PE, VC & M&A deals, subscribe to our Buysiders newsletter.

BOOK OF THE DAY

What We Value

Description: A neuroscientist’s guide to the hidden calculations in our brain that guide everyday decisions—and how we can work with those systems to make more fulfilling, aligned choices. Falk introduces the concept of a value calculation—the brain’s automatic way of assessing worth—and shows how we can tilt it toward purpose, resilience, and change.

Book Length: 304 pages
Release Date: April 8, 2025

Ideal For: Anyone who wants to understand why we make the choices we do—especially leaders, creators, and people trying to build new habits or influence others.

“What we value, what we pay attention to, and how we connect with others all shape the paths we take—often in ways we don’t even realize.”

DAILY VISUAL

Protein on a Generational Run

PRESENTED BY GELT

Smart Tax Moves for Founders & Business Owners

Running a business means juggling growth, funding, and compliance, all while building the financial discipline investors expect. 

Gelt’s dedicated CPA team leads your tax strategy, supported by proprietary AI tools so you can move faster with fewer surprises:

• Dedicated CPA lead: consistent point of contact, quarterly planning, fast answers

• Built for complexity: equity planning, R&D credits, multi-state compliance, liquidity events, handled end to end

• Clarity meets automation: one platform to track deadlines, projections, filings, and opportunities

• Cost-conscious design: uncover savings early, extend runway, avoid surprise audits

From fundraising to acquisition, Gelt helps founders stay ahead on tax strategy.

DAILY ACUMEN

Strategic Withdrawal

Sometimes the smartest move is to step back.

Investors call it de-risking; psychologists call it self-regulation.

Both mean conserving energy for higher-probability plays.

Constant engagement creates diminishing returns.

The mind and portfolio both need liquidity to recover.

If you are always in the market, you are never in control.

Strategic withdrawal is not weakness, it is awareness.

You are not quitting the game, you are protecting your capital.

ENLIGHTENMENT

Short Squeez Picks

• Why you need to be bored

• I gave ChatGPT $500 to pick stocks

• 9 tips to start running and stick with it

• How to address feedback on increasing visibility

• 10 CEOs share their best productivity tips

MEME-A-PALOOZA

Memes of the Day

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