🍋 Intern Hunger Games

Why one VC shop in NYC is publicly ranking each intern, plus the latest jobs data, and Barbie reaches $1B club.

Together With

“Sometimes the way to make money is when everyone else thinks the world is ending.” — Bill Ackman

Good Morning! In July, hiring experienced a slight slowdown, yet the U.S. economy managed to add nearly 200k jobs. The job market is finally returning to the pre-pandemic norms, but one aspect of Covid that’s here to stay? NYC just passed a law that will let restaurants keep their outdoor dining structures - as long as they remove them during the winter. And speaking of jobs and the pandemic - a new study uncovered that fully-remote new hires are 18% less productive.

The Barbie movie reached a $1 billion box office this weekend, bankruptcies among private-equity-backed portfolio companies are on track to reach a 13-year high, and back-to-school spending could reach $40 billion this fall.

If you are looking to invest in alternatives, check out today’s sponsor Masterworks, that has a track record of 15 exits, including net returns of +21.5% and +35.0%.


Intern Hunger Games

If you haven't been able to tell by all the teenage-looking students walking around Midtown in Patagonia Vests, intern season is in full swing. And while Wall Street interns are competing with each other for return offers, it’s usually just a friendly competition (but all bets are off at the company happy hour).

A venture capital firm Insight Partners is taking this ‘Intern Hunger Games’ to a whole new level. Insight ranks every single intern and then displays the rankings on a public leaderboard that all employees can see.

The ranking criteria are based on various yet vague metrics, such as meeting attendance, email communication, and phone calls. At VC funds like Insight, interns spend much of their time conducting research, making cold calls to startups, and presenting the most promising ones. Interns are expected to send upwards of 150-200 emails per week and make dozens of phone calls to find startups looking for funding.

And Insight manages $79 billion, reportedly has 18 investment summer analysts, and was an early backer of DocuSign and Shopify.

Despite the ranking system, the firm is supposedly reassuring interns not to worry about their position… (sounds good, will do!)

Takeaway: We’ve seen some odd buyside cultures in recent times - like the hedge fund Bridgewater recording all meetings, but ranking all the interns is up there in the wacky culture rankings. And as always, you can find our Wall Street firm feedback deck here.


Markets Rundown

Stocks closed lower after an underwhelming earnings quarter.

Movers & Shakers

  • (+) Tupperware ($TUP) +36% after reaching a debt restructuring deal.

  • (+) Amazon ($AMZN) +8% after posting a blowout quarter.

  • (–) TeIcahn Enterprises ($IEP) -23% after cutting its dividend after short-seller report.

Private Dealmaking

  • GoStudent, an Austrian tutor marketplace, raised $95 million

  • Endor Labs, a code and pipeline governance platform, raised $70 million

  • TytoCare, a virtual home care company, raised $49 million

  • Finda, a loan comparison platform, raised $37 million

  • Intellum, an enterprise learning management company, raised $25 million

  • Pockit, a prepaid credit card startup, raised $10 million


A Banksy Got Everyday Investors 32% Returns?

Mm-hmm, sure. So, what’s the catch?

We know it may sound too good to be true. But it’s not only possible, it’s happening—and thousands of investors are smiling all the way to the bank, thanks to the fine-art investing platform Masterworks.

These results aren’t cherry-picking. This is the whole bushel. Masterworks has built a track record of 15 exits, including net returns of +17.8%, +21.5%, and +35.0%, even while financial markets plummeted.

But art? Really? Okay, skeptics, here are the numbers. Contemporary art prices:

  • Outpaced the S&P 500 by 131% over the last 26 years

  • Have the lowest correlation to equities of any asset class

  • Remained stable through the dot-com bubble and ’08 crisis

Got your attention yet? Short Squeez readers can skip the waitlist with this exclusive link.


Top Reads

  • Jefferies snags about 20 Credit Suisse bankers for private capital team (WSJ)

  • China has become a strain on private equity firms (WSJ)

  • Amazon earnings beat brushes off mounting cloud concerns (YF)

  • Prosecutors seek bail revocation for SBF (ABC)
    KKR said to hand embattled payments firm Unzer to creditors (BB)

  • The next two weeks could be huge for crypto (YF)

  • Berkshire Hathaway swings to profit, boosted by investment returns (CNBC)

  • Robinhood swaps meme-green tights for duller look (Reuters)

  • AI brings carnage to wealth management (YF)

  • Alphabet dumps more than 90% of its stake in Robinhood (Reuters)


The Right Call

Sportswriter Sally Jenkins has spent her entire adult life observing and writing about great coaches and athletes. With her engaging and expert prose, she has helped shape the way we view these talented sports icons. But somewhere along the line, she realized, they had begun to shape her.

Now, she presents the astonishing inner qualities in these same people that pushed them to overcome pressure, elevate their performances, and discover champion identities.

Based on years of observing, interviewing, and analyzing elite coaches and playmakers, such as Bill Belichick, Peyton Manning, Michael Phelps, and more.

“A new way to think about greatness.”


Short Squeez Picks

  • The pros and cons of owning a rental property

  • The best NYC restaurants opening in August

  • 4 nonverbal secrets about eye contact

  • 3 ways to grow your professional visibility

  • The 10 business schools with the best return on investment


US 10-Year Treasury Bond Yield

Source: Axios


The Fastest Way to Become a Cigar Aficionado

If you are new to cigars and just a wee bit intimidated on where to start, Cigar Place has you covered. They’ve put together a sampler that includes ten of the industry's most renowned brands for pennies on the dollar.

Channel your inner Gordon Gekko and experience the depth and variety of flavors that have made these cigars a top choice among aficionados.

With this exclusive offer, you'll receive all ten premium, highly-rated cigars at 76% off their retail price. To make the deal even sweeter, they’re waiving shipping fees entirely.


Everything Is Cyclical

Did you know that everything in life is pretty cyclical? Like seasons or the rise and fall of your favorite sitcom ratings.

French geologists recently discovered that a Himalayan mountain suffered a massive landslide 800 years ago. Massive may be an understatement: the slide moved enough earth to bury Manhattan as high as the Empire State Building. Annapurna IV used to be one of the top-five tallest mountains in the world. Today, after the slide shaved a third of a mile off its top, it’s merely big.

Ever felt like you're on top of the world and then suddenly, things go south? Keep this in mind: victories and successes often plant seeds for challenges later on. Whether you’re a tech giant like Amazon or just doing your own thing, keep your eyes peeled.

Cycles are everywhere. So next time you're soaring high, remember the roller coaster might take a dip. But hey, that's what makes the ride exciting.


Memes of the Day




*Please note, this offer applies to USA orders only and is valid until 8/31/2023. Cigar Place reserves the right to substitute cigars of comparable or greater value in the event that a cigar within the sampler becomes unavailable.

See important Regulation A disclosures at masterworks.com/cd.

Join the conversation

or to participate.